My letter to Spirit Airlines and their most recent advertisement.

Dear So-and-So,

Let’s get to the point.

You've had some tacky advertisements before. I cringed when I saw the one with what looks to be Michael Jackson dropping Kate Middleton's newborn baby over a ledge (Classy.) Nonetheless, you do offer the "cheapest" prices in the airline industry, so sometimes, I find myself overlooking the ads to get to the plane ticket.

Until today. I opened your website to find an ad I assume is poking fun of the President Obama's selfie picture incident trending on the web.

Am I mad that it’s poking fun of President Obama? Nope.

Maybe it’s the fact that there’s a white woman and a black man in the ad? Nah, who cares.

What I don’t like, no, what I actually HATE are two things: First, you are perpetuating the “Angry Black Woman” stereotype by showing an, well, angry black woman. Please show me a picture where you see our First Lady screaming like a madwoman and I will head to the nearest Hallmark to buy you an apology card. I’m sure your marketing team thought it was funny. Maybe you didn’t read that much into it and did it to get a cheap laugh. But as a Black woman that knows what it feels like to be branded with such a negative label because maybe I’m not smiling enough or because sometimes giving my opinion is thought to be the equivalent of a rant, it is offensive. I won’t even waste my time giving background on what the Angry Black Woman is because you can 1) open your Web browser , 2) type in www.google.com, 3) enter “angry black woman” into the search field, 4) read results. (You are welcome.)

Second, Michelle LaVaughn Robinson Obama is the First Lady of the United States of America. Again, FIRST LADY of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. She is not anyone’s “wifey,” nor boo, nor baby momma, nor any other term you felt appropriate to indirectly use on a woman that is married to one of the most powerful men in the world.

Okay, so let’s say you magically made up the advertisement and it has nothing to do with the picture incident. Where in your mind did you think it was okay to use the term “wifey” in an advertisement with Black people? Again, I frequent your site often and receive your emails on a regular basis. It’s just funny to me that out of all of the advertisements (that you bombard me with on a daily basis I might add), you want to use “wifey” in this particular ad. I’d be willing to bet that you didn’t (and won’t) pull in Black customers with that line “Make wifey happy with Spirit’s low fares!” I’m pretty sure a Black man somewhere in the world didn’t push back his chair and say “Spirit’s right. I SHOULD make wifey happy!”

Here’s a fact that you maybe didn’t know: Black people…speak Standard English!” Who knew??? So save your slang, please and thank you. Don’t try to be hip or dumb anything down to make something either appeal to Group A or get a laugh out of Group B (who’s essentially laughing at Group A.)

I understand advertising and crafting things that are funny, attractive, and sometimes shocking in order to capture a consumer’s attention, but please. Have some couth in what you put out there. And don’t use your advertising as a platform to perpetuate stereotypes.


Sincerely,

CC

P.S. - Kick rocks.
P.P.S - With no socks.
P.P.P.S -Did that make me sound like an angry black woman?

Like A Boy

To be fair to my male readers (and to write a follow-up to a previous blog), I had to do something for the fellas:

Men, men, annnnnnnd more men.

Men continue to be the subject of conversation with friends these days. While most of the convos are very entertaining and filled with a lot of “mmhmgurlyeahs,” I often find myself playing devil’s advocate for black men. If you read my blog before, you know how much I despise stereotypes, so I am quick to squash any comments that sound of the sort. Just as there are many stereotypes of black women, the same lies for black men. The list goes on, but let’s touch on a few that leave me with le blank face. I’m sure some topics will spark the “But what if…” questions and if it does, that’s great! Please feel free to discuss it in your own blog. ☺ Okay ready? Prepared to have your mind-


Myth #1: Black men are emotionless beings.


Men are not robots. The very ones that walk around yelling “I don’t give a f***!” are probably locked in Marvin’s Room now with a box of Puffs. Men do not wear their heart on their sleeves. Women, on the other hand, tend to be openly expressive about our thoughts and emotions and sometimes we expect the same from a man. “You made me mad when you did abc…” or “I feel this way when you do xyz…” Don’t ever stop to think that he doesn’t have something brewing in the back of his mind just because he doesn't say anything. Most of it is never said because a) he is trying to avoid an argument or b) he doesn’t think it is important enough to bring up (and a lot of the times it is the latter.) And yes, we as women need to be reminded that our significant other cares, however, we shouldn’t intentionally do things to garner some kind of reaction. Don’t post Keyshia Cole lyrics on Facebook hoping that it will evoke the same emotion in him that it did for you. Don’t walk up to your man and say “Forget you! Forget us! I’m leaving!” and expect him to fall to the floor on his knees and cry “Please, babybaby please.” Yes, in some cases the man is truly apathetic or (flat out clueless), but there are men that, though truly affected by a given situation, will not respond in the way you want.

As for the OVERLY emotional men, that is a whole ‘nother blog.

Myth #2: All black men are cheaters.

Some call it optimism, other naivety. Call it what you want, but I am not quick to label all men as cheaters. If you are, well….a toast to you and your future endeavors. You can’t have healthy dating life or relationship if you have branded every man that walked into the picture. No, you can’t predict someone’s actions. Even the “perfect guy” might slip up. Conversely, you can’t go after men that you know aren’t good for you. Men that you know aren’t emotionally ready or even seeking relationships. Let’s NOT get started on women that started as side chicks, rose to be the main chick, and are now suspicious as hell.


I have talked to some really great men but also dated the scum of the earth. I realized that many of my trust issues have developed from talking to those men, but instead of looking at my poor decisions, I projected my disdain towards all men, maybe even trampling over some really good men in the process. I’ve come a long way and that’s because I stopped having bitter and unhappy people give me relationship advice and started looking at men and dating in general from an optimistic perspective. The least/most you can do is pray and have faith. Suspicion can lead people to do some ugly and absurd things, so if you are that untrustworthy of men you have several options: 1) Become the female Don Juan and never get emotionally attached to any man, at a cost. 2) Enter a relationship and resume the role of Inspector Gadget for the duration of the courtship, or 3) visit your local pet store and purchase a multitude of cats. A minimum of 10.

Myth #3: Black men are lazy and complacent, and therefore want nothing out of life.


I love when women have standards in who they befriend or date. You should always want to surround yourself with the best of the best. But…. don’t expect Prince Hakeem to bust through the front door and sweep you off your feet. There’s a difference between settling and being outright ridiculous. I’m not saying to go out and cuff the next McDonald’s worker on Joy Rd. and Southfield (nothing wrong with working at Mickey D’s!), however, just because a man is in a certain position when you meet him, doesn't mean he isn't working towards something greater. Society has crafted this ideal image of what defines a man and most men face a lot of pressure trying to live up to those standards. I have played listening ear to many of these frustrations ranging from marriage to career goals. What I found is that because men can be prideful (or simply not willing to share personal problems), they will not divulge the ongoing battle with themselves because they are not where they want to be in life. It doesn't help when there are women constantly looking for a six-figure, Benz-driving, Idris Elba look-a-like (oh Lord Jesus, it’s a fahr.) But, if a man does not have that, it does not make him any less of a man. The issue lies in dating someone who lacks ambition, a plan, and the discipline needed to put the plan into action. He should want more out of life, just as you.

There you have it folks. Keep in mind this list barely scratches the surface, but at the end of the day, 'tis all shenanigans. People will continue to think how they want to think. I just hope this opened the mind of some of my female readers. Not sure if I have any male readers though, because you know men act like it pains them to read a simple...

Just kidding folks! Juuuust kidding.