Up All Night

*Martin voice* wazzup, Wazzup, WAZZUP!!!!!!!

It's quite baffling how much relationships have evolved in life. Correction: it’s quite baffling how much relationships have evolved since my last posting. -____- It was so much easier in elementary school:

Girl 1: “I don’t like you.”
Girl 2: “I don’t like you either then!”
Girl 1 and 2: “Psssh!”
*walks separate ways*

Girl 1:” I like you.”
Boy 1: “Yeah, you cool ‘n all.”
Girl 1: “Be my boyfriend?”
Boy 1: “Aight.”
*holds hands and skips off into the sunset*

But the older I get, the more I’m finding that I need an instruction manual on how to keep and maintain relationships. For example, when I look back at the group picture from my graduation post, I am amazed at how certain friendships have either strengthened- or weakened-- over a 6-month period. Call it naive, but at a certain age in life (let's say, oh, 25), you would think that you're set with who you call your friends, who you've marked as your right-hand men, and who you’ve marked as enemies or fair-weathered. Per usual, Christina had to learn the hard way.

Back in August, I had friend of seven years KICK me out of her car at a gas station in the middle of nowhere, 3 am in the morning, in a club dress and flats. Why? Because I saved her from being pummeled by a man whom she decided to have a little drunken road rage argument with. While I'm inside of this gas station trying to explain what happened in between tears and hiccups to an attendant that wore a look of both confusion and concern, I looked down at my phone to read a text stating:

"You made my sister cry. She's not used to seeing people yell at me."

*One moment please*

ARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Bish your sister is 21 years old!!!! And furthermore-

(Once again, I apologize folks. I really do. I'm clearly over it and will practice better decorum than the behavior exhibited above. Proceed.)

The ironic thing is that by the end of the night, I wanted to continue texting the girl, maybe even call her to talk about the situation over the phone.

Moral of the story: If you ever get kicked out of a car, don’t forget to grab your pumps. If you’re going to be stranded, at least look fashionable.

No, the moral of the story is don’t ever expect that your relationship with someone cannot and will not change, at any given moment, on any given Sunday. No matter how long you knew the person, things change and people change. There are times like this where I want to call or text someone that I’m on bad terms with, but I am tired of being the “bigger person.” I am tired of over-analyzing my past actions or words to see what I did wrong or what I could’ve done differently. I believe in keeping open lines of communication with people who I consider friends, and would expect them to do them same. However, I’ve now learned to make peace with certain situations and move on.

So I guess this post isn’t so much about the troubles of relationships, but about developing the understanding that some people are in your life for a season. Yes, the old cliché says, “There are things worth fighting for,” however, there are more things placed in our lives to be just lessons and experiences. We try so hard to hold on to the WRONG things. The man that’s not, and will never be, relationship material. The woman who left you, and no matter how hard you work to get her back, does not want you back. The friend that’s ignoring your calls or other attempts to reconnect. Whatever the case may be, it is fine to let it go. Otherwise, you’re just creating less space for the right people to stay or enter your life. I truly believe God has special anointing on my life and is slowly lifting people off of my back as scale the mountain of success. I’ll be happy enjoy that success with people that are still there for me....

....and love me for my ratchetness.